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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/30144567">Mine to subdue</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tabata/pseuds/Tabata'>Tabata</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Shadowhunter Chronicles - Cassandra Clare</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>M/M</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-03-19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-15 18:22:17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>4,083</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/30144567</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tabata/pseuds/Tabata</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Tommy has always known that he and Gabriel are destined to be together, but Gabriel struggles with the idea of putting him in mortal danger by breaking one of the biggest taboo among the Nephilim: parabatai can't be lovers. To try and avoid himself and Tommy a future of pain, he finds someone else to be with. But Tommy's blind jealousy could lead to serious consequences.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Original Male Character/Original Male Character</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Mine to subdue</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I wanted to talk about Oren, but this story didn't want to go <i>that</i> way. Besides, Lisachan hates him, so it probably wouldn't have been a great idea. I wrote about Tommy and Gabriel instead, who are always so desperately intense.</p>
<p>written for: COWT #11 @ landedifandom.net (Week 6)<br/>prompt: I will kill your friends and family to remind you of my love. ~ King George, Hamilton</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Tommy has always known that he and Gabriel were destined to be together since the first moment he saw him. It was a very confusing feeling at first – but again, he was four so he believes he can cut himself some slack there – but it was already there. He saw him standing at the entrance of the New York Institute, a grumpy mundane child who had no intention of being there, holding an old rucksack to his chest, and he fell in love.</p>
<p>When he thinks about the bond that ties them together so tight that, sometimes, they feel like one single entity, Tommy knows without the trace of a doubt that it was born there, in the moment he made eye contact with Gabriel that day, and not during the parabatai ceremony. That was just the natural consequence of them sharing space and breath and training for nine years. The ritual only strengthened something that was already there, it fed it a stronger magic and gave it the chance to become truly unbreakable.</p>
<p>Gabriel asked him once if he regretted becoming parabatai – they had to do it fast, when Tommy was only thirteen, before Gabriel was too old for it – but he said no. He could never see the problem in that, honestly. To him, they were together before they even met, so whatever comes after that has to work with what they are, and they are everything. Friends, brothers, lovers, parabatai.</p>
<p>They are the bond they share, which is something nobody else has ever had as far as they know, and it shouldn't follow any rules.</p>
<p>The bond is not just magic, though.</p>
<p>At the beginning he thought it was their angel blood manifesting in another way – and with Gabriel being born a mundane, that would have explained why they were so different from anybody else – but it's definitely not just that. The bond is a living thing, capable of mutating with time and according to their circumstances. It grows stronger with them – or it's possibly the other way around, they never really tested which way it goes – and it adapts, like an animal, to their needs and strengths. </p>
<p>It's not a weapon they can wield. It's what makes <i>them</i> the weapon.</p>
<p>Over the course of the past few years, things have changed drastically between them. When they were younger, they could anticipate each other's every move. They were brilliant in combat. It was like looking at one single body moving. His uncle Sebastian was very excited every time he trained them because there was very little he had to teach them in terms of synchronicity and he could focus on things he liked more, like strength, strategy and the most efficient ways to be lethal. He helped them become unbeatable.</p>
<p>Then, what was only some form of connection in battle became stronger in every other moment too and they started to <i>feel</i> one another everywhere else, more and more every day until it wasn't just a feeling anymore. Now Tommy knows how Gabe is doing at any time, no matter where they are or what they're doing. It is like a part of himself was always there, with Gabe, and could experience what he's going through. He doesn't know exactly what he's doing, but he can always take an educated guess and get it right.</p>
<p>Today, though, Tommy can't quite understand what Gabriel is feeling and that makes him suspicious.</p>
<p>Tommy is training with a bunch of small kids his uncle has dropped on him when this strong feeling washes over him, drowning him for a second. Training is being pretty boring – the kids are cute, but they are also four and they are totally ineffective against him – so that's reason enough to excuse himself and leave the room. </p>
<p>Gabriel is feeling pleasure, that much is unquestionable, but it could mean anything because for Tommy and him pleasure can be a lot of different things, not only sex. Blood and battle trigger reactions that are very much like orgasms in them. But what confuses Tommy is that his parabatai is not at peace at all.</p>
<p>It's like looking at a whirlpool in a lake. It might seem just water at first, but then you start noticing things swirling in it. In the white light of Gabe's pleasure – that is how he likes to visualize it – Tommy can see the red strikes of his rage and a black heart of violence. He understands, then, that Gabriel is letting out whatever thing has been chewing at him for days and weeks and months on end. Sometimes he directs all that mess that he has inside towards Tommy, and Tommy can welcome it and crash it to nothingness, but sometimes Gabriel uses that mess to keep him away. It's his excuse to run and hide and do things and people he doesn't care about.</p>
<p>Tommy lets that feeling guide him upstairs. It's like a rope made of energy pulling at his heart. They normally use it to call on each other when they are apart, like a doorbell, but right now he feels like he shouldn't pull at it. The closer he gets to Gabriel's room the stronger the feeling gets, the more defined, and before he can even reach the door and hear the moans, he knows what's going on.</p>
<p>Tommy already knew that Gabe was fucking around.</p>
<p>It's not something he would gladly discuss, but it's definitely not a secret. Gabriel has a very strong libido and he started satisfying it a long time before Tommy and him started having sex. There is no girl at the Institute that is not in love with him and a great number of boys would get in bed with him too, no question asked. And that despite the fact that Gabriel has exactly no people skill. He's not charming, he's got no sense of humor and he's not the kind of guy you have random conversations with in a club. He's just very handsome and very strong, and one look at him and you know what he's going to do to you.</p>
<p>The wave of his testosterone alone makes panties drop, so Tommy is well aware of what he will find behind that door. He should turn around and leave, but he has never been able to do that once in his life and he will definitely not start now.</p>
<p>He pushes the door open, not even that gently, expecting them to stop, but they don't.</p>
<p>Gabriel is naked. The bedsheet does very little to cover him, so Tommy can see that there's been a first time already and that he's ready for the second round. Underneath him, there is a male fairy. He is, like all the other members of his species, unnaturally perfect, and therefore disgustingly so. He's tall and skinny like a reed. He's got skin pale like the moon and graceful limbs, silver eyes and beautiful hands with long fingers and manicured nails. Whatever his real form is – hair of leaves, a wooden ribcage or half a skeleton face – is well glamoured.</p>
<p>Tommy has seen him around before, in some of the clubs they go to when they patrol, at some of the diplomatic meetings at the Institute and even in Alicante once, and now he wonders if the fairy was there because he had something to do or if that something was Gabriel.</p>
<p>Oren, that's his name. He comes from the Unseelie Court, which is the court Tommy likes less.<br/>
Sure, they have allies in there – Julian's brother Mark and his boyfriend Kieran, among many others – but fairies are tricky by nature and Unseelie fairies are just a bit worse than that. They always have to tread so much more carefully with them, despite being friends with their king, and more than once Tommy has wondered if it is really worth it. Finding one of them here, on Gabriel's cock, does not exactly work in their favor.</p>
<p>Tommy doesn't need to talk – which is a blessing because he's so full of hatred right now that he doesn't know how to open his mouth without screaming – he just has to expand his own energy and drown Gabe in it, pull at that invisible rope that connects them.</p>
<p>Tommy waits.</p>
<p>He watches as Gabe comes out of the stupid fairy. He watches Oren sigh – is that <i>irritation</i>? – and settles better on the pillows as if that was his bed. He patiently ignores Gabriel's first pathetic attempt at an apology that always starts with his own name, “Tommy,” as if knowing that Gabriel still remembers his name could make anything better.</p>
<p>Tommy waits for Gabe to be sitting back and then he throws himself at the slut on the bed, the scream he has been holding for the past few minutes erupting from his mouth unbridled. He would crash him against the same blankets Gabe fucked him in and punch his face until there's nothing left to send to Kieran but a bag of bones, but Gabe can probably feel what he wants to do the moment he's thinking it. It's not even a question of seconds, the very thought that is born in Tommy's mind is already in Gabriel's too.</p>
<p>Gabe intercepts him, he closes his strong arms around him and pins him down on the bed.</p>
<p>With them.</p>
<p></p><div class="center">
  <p>*</p>
</div>Gabriel doesn't waist any time to think.<p>He has trained all his life to work on instincts – it's kind of in his job description to move faster than his own thoughts – but whenever Tommy is involved, it's never really about training. It's the bond that works on them on a subconscious level. He perceives Tommy intentions before he himself can fully act upon them, so it's easy to grab him before he can reach Oren on the bed.</p>
<p>Oren screams anyway, though, which is highly annoying to him. He can't deal with hysterics. That is why Sebastian only tried to put him in charge of calming people during an emergency once and then never again. He can fight people, he can kill people, he can keep people safe, but send him to comfort them and they will just scream more. </p>
<p>Luckily, Oren knows better than keep screaming, and after a moment, he crawls behind him, which is a wise choice since Tommy seems determined to keep going after him. Gabriel pushes his parabatai on the bed with his whole body, but when Tommy is angry, he's a wild animal and it's not easy to keep him down.</p>
<p>“Easy!” Gabriel roars as Tommy tries to claw his eyes off and ends up scratching his face, instead. “Calm down!”</p>
<p>“Fuck you!” Tommy screams in his face. He knees him in the groin and pushes him down the bed. The moment he's free, he goes for Oren, who doesn't have time to defend himself, given that he would have the ability to begin with. Tommy grabs him by the hair and slams his head against the headboard. “Get the fuck out of here, slut,” he barks in his face, drops of spit landing on his pale skin. “I swear to God, if I see your stupid face again, I'm going to kill you!”</p>
<p>“Thomas!” Gabriel launches himself on the bed again and pulls his parabatai away from Oren's whimpering body. Tommy growls and screams and scratches, trying to get rid of him.</p>
<p>“Get the fuck away from here, you stupid bitch!” He hisses at Oren. “What are you waiting for, uh? A written invitation? Do you need an acorn or what? You got his cock, now get out of my fucking face. He'll send you a check!”</p>
<p>Oren turns to look at Gabriel, his lips slightly parted. He touches his forehead and his fingers come away red with blood. “Gabriel,” he murmurs, and his voice gets stuck in the middle of his name as if he wanted to shorten it and then thought better otherwise.</p>
<p>Gabriel doesn't have time for him now. “Oren, just go,” he says coldly as he forces Thomas to look away from the fairy and to focus on him. He can feel him getting off the bed and getting dressed, he hears him close the door but his head is already somewhere else.</p>
<p>Naively enough, he expects Tommy to calm down the moment the door closes, but that doesn't happen. If anything, with Oren gone, Tommy hits him more furiously, his anger fueled by a whole new set of emotions that Gabriel can't identify but that he was clearly hiding from the fairy.</p>
<p>“Let me go, you asshole!” He barks in Gabriel face.</p>
<p>Gabriel backs off. He doesn't have to protect anyone anymore and Tommy, despite his fury, is no danger to him. He grabs his pants and puts them on while Tommy rolls off the bed, still growling like a rabid dog. “Do you think we can talk, now?” He asks.</p>
<p>“About what?”</p>
<p>“About what just happened,” Gabriel goes on.</p>
<p>“Oh, I don't need to talk about that, everything was pretty clear to me,” Tommy says, and the energy whirling inside of him is so strong that Gabriel can feel it on his skin, and it burns. Their bond is tense, as if Tommy were pulling and pulling at it to make it snap.</p>
<p>Gabriel tries to resist, until he can almost feel it tear and it physically hurts him. “Stop doing that!” He screams, bending forward. </p>
<p>“Doing what, Gabe?” Tommy says, pretending he doesn't know. He jerks the bond again and it feels like it's ripping, but it can't rip like that and, somehow, it's even worse. “You don't like it? It's not nice when they do it to you, is it?”</p>
<p>“Tommy, stop it!”</p>
<p>Tommy looks at him, the bond tensing between them a little more, and then he lets go. Gabriel takes a deep breath and sits down gingerly. “Now you know what it feels like to have your guts ripped apart like that.”</p>
<p>Gabriel is breathing a little better now that the pain is receding. “You knew what was going on already,” he mutters. He doesn't know why he says that. Maybe he just needs Tommy to admit this wasn't a surprise.</p>
<p>“Sure, because that is what you always do, Gabe. Your head starts spinning counterclockwise and there you go, fucking around. It's not even a defense mechanism. It's like your brain short-circuits your cock or something! And you don't even hide it anymore. It's not only me, <i>everybody else</i> knows. I usually don't have to wait and feel it, someone says it to me, as if I wanted to know! Can you imagine being approached by a guy you have seen, like, three times in your life and being told your parabatai is <i>smashing that fairy again</i>? Or a werewolf, or a vampire. It seems like you collected them all! Not to mention that time you went on a mundane spree. Feeling nostalgic much? So, no, Gabe, this was not a surprise, but it doesn't change the fact that it sucked!”</p>
<p>“This is still no excuse to act like you did!” Gabriel frowns. He can take everything from Tommy – in fact, he made it his mission to deal with the tragedy they are so Tommy doesn't have too – but other people getting hurt is where he draws the line. And not for the people involved, but for Tommy. Again.</p>
<p>“If you think I give a fuck about him, you don't know me.”</p>
<p>“You could have killed him, Tommy!” Gabriel stands up, looking at him in shock. He can't believe Tommy doesn't see the problem in storming the room and starting to slam someone's head against the headboard.</p>
<p>“Did you hear what I just said?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You can do anything you want to me, Tommy. You can throw everything you've got <i>at me</i>, I can take it! I have the strength to do so. But anyone else? They don't stand a chance! You can't just—“ Gabriel swallows. His own inability to convey any kind of emotion is frustrating. “You are too strong. You need to keep yourself under control! You can't just go around punching people in the face just because you're angry!”</p>
<p>“I'm furious, not angry!” Tommy takes a few steps towards him, unable to keep away from Gabriel even when he's mad at him. Gabriel knows that feeling. He wants to get closer too. “And that stupid bitch is lucky I didn't do worse!”</p>
<p>“You could have killed him!”</p>
<p>“I wanted to!”</p>
<p>This should shock Gabriel on a much deeper level, but the truth is that he knows Tommy too well not to hear the truth in those words and not to accept it for what it is as he does with every other aspect of his parabatai's life. It's easy when you know that blind rage because it's the same as your own. “I can't have you go around hurting people, Tommy,” he says sternly. “This is exactly why the—“</p>
<p>“But you go around hurting me! What you do, it hurts me, Gabe! It hurts <i>me</i>!" He touches his own chest angrily. "But you don't seem to care about that, do you? You keep doing it over and over and over, and you never stop to ask yourself if I'm okay."</p>
<p>"Everything I do is to protect you!” Gabriel roars, rage mounting in him too, at last. He can fight this fight until he's got no strength left and still keep fighting, but it will all be for nothing if Tommy doesn't understand why he's trying so desperately to be away from him. “This, us, this can't be, Tommy. Not now, maybe not in a year, but sooner or later they would find out and they would strip us of our marks. I'm trying to avoid that."</p>
<p>"Those years would be worth it,” Tommy screams, the tears that have been threatening to come out since he entered the room are finally spilling out. “I will take a few years with you over a lifetime alone!”</p>
<p>“That is not going to happen, Tommy!” Gabriel finally explodes, and for the first time in years, words just come out of him in a seemingly endless flow. “It wouldn't be romantic! It wouldn't be melancholic! It'd be pain and eternal damnation! It'd be a fucking tragedy! Don't you get it? You wouldn't just be alone, you'd be miserable, if you even get to be alive! And—and that is if you don't turn crazy way before that.”</p>
<p>"You don't understand.”</p>
<p>"No, you're the one who doesn't understand!” Gabriel points at the unmade bed a few feet from them. “You were angry <i>at me</i> and you almost cracked Oren's skull! What if something else happens and I'm not there to stop you?”</p>
<p>“Nothing's going to happen to me if he keeps his legs closed!”</p>
<p>Gabriel rolls his eyes. “Today it was him, and tomorrow? You are getting progressively more violent! We both are! What if you don't need to be <i>angry</i> anymore? What if you kill someone just because they stand next to me? Or because you don't like their face?”</p>
<p>“You're not listening to me,” Tommy says, calmly this time. And it's a scary flavor of calmness that chills Gabriel to the bone because he has seen it already. It's the state of mind Tommy gets in one moment before unleashing himself on the enemy. Despite the tears, his eyes are steady and filled with determination. “You are mine, Gabe. Mine. And I will kill anyone who threatens us. Your stupid whores, your friends, even your family, if they get between me and you. I don't care if it's right or wrong. If this is what I have to do to remind you that I love you more than life itself, more than my own freedom, I will do it. It's not a question of morality, it's just what has to be done. I have no other choice. And if you think you wouldn't do the same, you're just lying to my face.”</p>
<p>Gabriel opens his mouth to deny, but he can't. He has always thought to get away from Tommy so he could move on and have a life without him, but he has never consciously imagined that life. It was just a notion at the back of his head, something he had to make happen, but not totally real. “I—“</p>
<p>“Think of me on that bed, Gabe,” Tommy says, now softly. “Me with someone else. A boy, a girl, it doesn't really matter as long as it's not you. Would it make you happy to know I'm with them? Would you finally be at peace knowing that I'm away from you, yes, but not in danger anymore? Can you really stomach the idea of it? Visualize it, Gabe. It's too easy if you don't. <i>See</i> me with someone else, Gabe, and tell me you wouldn't do the same.”</p>
<p>Gabe can lie, of course, but he never really did. Even when he runs away and says he does it for Tommy, he never lies. He really believes that. So when he imagines Tommy kissing someone else, hugging someone else, riding him and moaning for him, and speaking words Gabe knows Tommy has only said to him in his whole life, he feels the surge of energy within himself as rage and jealousy mix together, wrapping themselves around him and crashing him with a strength that is their strength. </p>
<p>He doesn't speak, he said too much already.</p>
<p>Gabriel pulls him towards himself and he feels Tommy respond instantly to his touch. He doesn't need to look at him to know where to touch. If he looks at him it's because Gabriel missed him, because a few hours without touching him are torture and without the sight of him are impossible. And every time he wills himself to forget that. He says to himself that he will go away because he <i>has to</i>, but his life's imperative is another. His life's imperative is Tommy.</p>
<p>Tommy welcomes him in his arms, and Gabe is like a sailor coming home after being away for years. But Tommy is not a comfortable shore, he's the ocean he misses with all his being whenever he stays too much ashore, the expanse of water that every so often rises in the tallest wave and makes him crash against the rocks only to see him coming back for more.</p>
<p>They miss the bed, but they don't really care. They rip each other's clothes off with a such a fury that Gabriel's pants lose their buttons, and he doesn't care for that either. Tommy claws at his skin and climbs on him, repeating “take me, take me, take me”, incessantly. Gabriel follows his words, he grabs his hips, he impales him on himself and enjoys the moment Tommy moans for the first time on his lips.</p>
<p>It's the only brief moment of peace.</p>
<p>Then, they assault each other again. It's a war more than sex, but it's love more than just longing, and even Gabriel knows that. When they are together the world sets itself straight again, not just in a romantic way.<br/>
Their energy stops hurting and burning their skin, torn between two bodies. It turns warm and welcoming, it's whole again. It's home, finally.</p>
<p>Gabriel can feel it wrapping around them as he thrusts inside Tommy and he feels safe. Nothing can hurt them now, nothing can go past it. They are protected and safe only when they are together, when they can touch each other and draw everything they need from one another. They are a unit and every step away is a tear in the fabric they're made of, it's a hole in their armour. It's not acceptable.</p>
<p>Gabriel knows that comes tomorrow – maybe even before that – he will want to run away, but right now everything is perfect.</p>
<p>He comes hard, burying himself deep in Tommy's body and holding him tight as he comes too. For minutes after that he just listens to their labored breathing filling the room. The rest of the world is silent, or it disappeared, it doesn't really matter.</p>
<p>“You're an idiot,” Tommy says after a while, nibbling at his neck. Whatever happened in this room only an hour ago is irrelevant now and it will be for the next few weeks.</p>
<p>“I'm sorry.”</p>
<p>Tommy sighs. “I know,” he says. He's calmer now that he can hold him again.</p>
<p>Until next time, this will have to do.</p>
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